02 Apr Foods For Marriage.
The Tools For A better Marriage.
The day a man stops to feed his marriage with quality and required foods, that is the day the marriage will start dying.
Many marriages are in coma today because they are starved and malnourished. As a result, it’s difficult for the marriage to produce good fruits.
Like the case of the fig tree, Jesus expected the fig tree to give back at his time of need, but unfortunately, it couldn’t give what it did not have.
Jesus did not waste time; immediately, he pronounced judgement on the fig tree.
When it is time for you to start seeing the good fruit your marriage should produce, may you not start to see bitterness.
Pay quality attention to your marriage today, you will enjoy your old age.
Quality foods for marriage.
1. Love.
2. Attention.
3. Surprises.
4. Sexual Intercourse.
1. Love.
Love is the first currency that marriage lives on. Love is the first food that marriage survived with. A fat marriage lavishes itself with delicacies called love. A marriage where there is no love, there’s no live, such a marriage is just living but to pack up at any time because the sustenance is absent. Love sustains marriage.
There are marriages that appear not to possess what it takes to survive a year in appearance, but it keeps on for years with one face of love. Either the man or the woman is the one applying love to sustain the marriage, while the other one is nonchalant. Though kept going weak with injury, yet there is life in the marriage.
Only waiting for the second face to come up and the marriage with the family will take off. It would begin to make impart. Where love is totally absent, the marriage will be hungry and enter into a coma, if care is not taken, it will totally become dead and nothing can bring it back, except a miracle by God.
The love we are talking about here is the love that proves every error wrong and impotent. The real love that crosses fire with the loved one. That enter into the sea with a victim even when he or she does not know how to swim. He will say I will try, I will learn it now and apply it immediately.
This kind of love quickly draws strength from the book of Philippians 4:13
I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.
Case study.
A woman was sick and was diagnosed with a kidney problem. When they could not find a match on time, her husband volunteered to offer one of his kidneys if it matches to save his wife. This happened at a die minute.
Which Love is greater than this? Life to save life.
This is the type of love we are talking about.
In that case, the marriage is feeding from love, and it will keep growing fat.
2. Attention.
Any marriage that lacks the attention of either the husband or the woman suffers marital malnutrition. The regular presence of a couple in marriage is the life of the marriage. There is no marriage without one issue or the other, but the availability of who should tackle the issue instantly makes it not linger and therefore will not be accumulated.
A problem solved instantly dies alone. It has no privilege to create or lead to another issue. The family will keep making progress on every side.
The attention your spouse needs may not be the attention your children need. The one your business or work needs is different from the one your car needs. All these mentioned and others require your attention but should be on the ground of priority.
The attention you will give to your spouse and your children will have a direct impact on your marriage.
The money you give to your spouse as it required cannot replace your presence and the attention he or she wants from you.
■ He or she wants to share his or her daily experience with you.
■ He or she would like to have your opinion concerning a matter as a confidant before taking a decision, knowing fully well that you will provide every support to see the contribution to a logical conclusion.
■ whenever he or she dresses up for any purpose, the first person to point out the areas that need adjustment is you. The first person to admire him or her after the adjustment is you.
Your question may be, if you are not around, will she not adjust her dresses? Social media is a made easy medium of connection today. He or she can snap his or herself and send to you anywhere you are for a Comment.
When a woman does not have the attention of her husband, everywhere would be boring for her, even the marriage. If care is not taken, life is gradually getting out of the marriage. If it takes a long time, the woman may start taking solace in friends or another man, which is dangerous to the marriage.
There are women, may be because of their personal principle or a religious belief, may not be involved in any of the above activities. She may develop a thick skin that will make her not to even bother about the attention of her husband.
Gradually the affection is eroding. This is a rescue stage that every sensitive man has to quickly do something to save the woman and the marriage.
A man who lacks attention is prone to depression.
In the case of a man, when the attention of his wife becomes a scarce commodity, it begins to affect him little by little. Solace becomes necessary. It’s either he seeks friends he can share feelings with or a woman who can offer the little of what his wife should have done.
This is where some men end up taking another woman as a wife, an unplanned mission.
Depression.
The one who finds it disgusting to take solace in either friends or strange woman, may be, as a result of his faith or self principle, will gradually find himself slipping into depression.
How many women have helped their husbands to lose their full potential, all because they have no time for the man? Attention in marriage works wonders, but not loudly pronounced. It is the result that proves that attention is in action in the family.
People come to appreciate the place of attention in a relationship when it is withdrawn and negativities begin to show up, couples will begin to sense that something is lost. The deep thinker of the two, on many occasions with the help of the Holy Spirit is the one that will now identify the cause with the search light as “the absence of ATTENTION”
There has never been a relationship that is being faced with challenges as a result of lack of attention, that quickly reverse the action before getting to RED line that did not overcome the challenges.
A red line is the line between positive and negative. The positive side is the side where things can still be adjusted easily. While the negative side is the side that even if there will be a solution, there are reasons that will make it impossible except by God’s intervention.
For example, a lady who was pregnant for a husband who abandoned her with the stress of the pregnancy, even at the point of delivery, where another man came to her rescue; fed her before delivery time, took her to the hospital, footed the hospital bill and the time of delivery came, he was there for her. She finally lost the child to the scene.
The journey did not end there, every time of need that she closes her eyes to think of where help will come, she opens her eyes to see help from the same man. The day the man will ask for her love, she would gladly give it to him.
If the husband who abandoned her in the time of difficult pregnancy will now come back to his senses, and ask to have his wife back when the woman has fully settled with the other man in peace. Will that be an easy task? The matter has crossed the RED LINE. It’s only God’s intervention that can reverse it.
Attention for the children.
Attention to the children is another thing to take seriously. The parents provide food, shelter, daily materials, and school fees as the need arises.
This alone is not enough, the attention of the provider of these provisions is also needed. That is how the provider will get to know if the provision is correctly channelled in a right direction.
Every human being likes freedom; where there is no correction, no restriction and enforcement. The end of such freedom is disappointment, failure, and druggy in some cases.
When the parents choose to give the attention due to the children to them, there are things that naturally do happen among the children but are not known to the absentee parents. It can only happen by paying adequate attention to the welfare and day-to-day activities of the children.
And children always take caution If they know your attention is on them.
The attention given to children as a party in a marriage is a seed for bonding, which will later grow to produce fruit for the family to enjoy in the old age of the parents. It would also produce branches of family of its kind.
Attention to the family is one of the nutrients that make marriage stay healthy.
Attention for gender.
The Girls.
There is no how smart a man can be, and he will be capable enough to watch over a girl child. She’s a gender of her mother’s kind. Therefore, the mother is in the position to grant full attention to her growth and other female activities. She would share it with her husband, especially where he needs to contribute his quota financially and otherwise.
The mother knows how to politely present it. It is the business of the couple but more to the woman than the man.
The Boys.
There are women who appear as iron ladies. They are known as no – nonsense women on a large scale, to an extent it has worked for them, especially at work. Raising children is different.
A woman who beats her chest to train children alone, including the boys, does not know the implication. You can’t give what you don’t have. You will surely get to where the man is required, you will wish the cup passes you over. By the time you would finish handling the situation, it would be a matter full of trial and error.
There are occasions madam iron lady will want to apply capital punishment. The boys will start hiding things from her, and they would successfully do so. The result is in future “a keg of gunpowder”.
Every family needs the attention of the father to contribute his quota in bringing the children up in a way that they will be useful for themselves and others.
3. Surprises.
Surprise is one of the foods that marriage feeds on for greater satisfaction and manifestations.
Surprise is so magnetic to love and favour. It is a yeast in bread flour. The investment of yeast in flour makes the flour rises in full measure to produce enough bread.
There are positive surprises, and there are negative surprises. The one we center our emphasis on is the positive one that will make marriage a better place for a family.
Surprise here means the occurrence that happened suddenly as the beneficiary was not expecting it.
There is no how a man will go on his way to meet the need of his wife which she was not expecting, that the she will not stand still. In some cases, such a woman will bust into tears, the tears of joy and appreciation.
There is no how she will not pray for you and love you more. By that, the marriage will be healthier because it’s feeding fat from the side of the man through the instrumentality of SURPRISE gift.
The position of some women, who believe that the money they have is for them and the money of their husbands is for everybody, is entirely wrong. It is a tool in the hand of the devil to tear family apart even while still together.
When a woman went on her way to surprise her husband with a valuable gift he was not expecting, his love and respect for her will increase.
Types of surprises
a . Minor surprises.
b . Major surprises.
c. Capital surprises.
a. Minor surprise.
Is the surprises of little gifts offered to the loved ones surprisingly. Though it may be small, it goes a long way in sorting a problem in the life of the one who received it. It also indicates the love he or she has for the spouse and the marriage.
For instance,
The gift of roll-on deodorant, body spray, handkerchiefs, or face towel, singlets, camisole, undies, tissues, slippers, and so on.
It may be small but goes a long mile into the heart of your spouse.
The fact that he or she is not expecting it, and you have studied that he or she needs it, immediately he or she sees it, the mind will go to the need the gift will solve. He or she can’t but appreciate you deeply for the gift. The next move is to start planning how to put it into use. This gesture strengthens relationships and also dipping marriages.
b. Major surprises.
Major surprises are the surprises that are higher than the minor surprises. Such like expensive wristwatch, expensive clothes, expensive perfume, necklace, shoes, money into his or her account, birthday celebration, arrangement to meet an admired celebrity etc.
It runs people to make a crazy shout that attracts attention because it’s unexpected, it is sudden. All these boost and make marriages romantic. It makes the receiver know how much the spouse loves him or her.
Each time your spouse puts this into a use, he or she will feel like being on top of the world.
This type of Surprise springs regularly joy, each time he or she wears the wristwatch, cloth, or the necklace for an occasion, and it boosts the esteem of him or her who wears it, it gladdens his or her heart. This will make the said individual to remain more committed to the marriage.
c. Capital surprises.
Capital surprises are surprises that solve the problem or a need that one looks forward to solving but does not have capacity to do, neither does he nor she know where help will come from.
Capital surprises are also those surprises that require an extra mile or effort to achieve. It stays with the beneficiary longer than the other two above (minor and major surprises).
These are the kind of surprises that cause the beneficiary to either bust into tears or speechless towards the giver.
Surprises, such like car, houses, land, and vacation to a place he or she longs for. Etc.
Marriage feeds on capital surprises for absolute security. Security of love, finance, stable home, confidence, and so on.
Wrong notion about Surprises
It is popular among some women that giving gifts or making a surprise to one’s spouse is the business of the husband to the wife. It is the responsibility of the husband to surprise his wife with a gift, especially on her birthday. When it comes to the birthday of the husband, the greatest gift he deserves and he can get is” happy birthday”
A surprise gift is for both the husband and wife to give to each other as led by the spirit.
Warning.
If you offer surprises to your spouse and he or she has not reciprocated the same, please don’t get angry. It shows he or she has not grown up to your level of understanding as far as that is concerned.
Just be patient, with time he will catch up. Your good work will win him or her one day.
Surprises to children is a drive.
There is no marriage that can succeed without the input of the three parties that make up the marriage (the father, mother, and children).
Some time, for children to do well and be focused on their pursuit, to give the family joy, they need to be encouraged. Surprise as related to their desire is one of the encouragements that children can receive from the family, which himself will have to pay back in good performance, kindness, and conduct.
He who much is given; much is expected.
When you give them something, they will process it and give you a good result. Therefore, invest good impressions in them by giving them surprises. They will grow up to also raise such a good family for themselves one day.
START
4. Sexual Intercourse.
Intercourse is an action or obligation meant to happen between a husband and his wife.
Such intercourse has God’s backing and approval, all because it has his knowledge.
Therefore, it can take place between the parties at any time, but must be with a sense of decorum and responsibilities. It is a sacred thing, it carries dignity, therefore must be without interference from any third party.
Intercourse is not for child bearing alone, it’s also meant for pleasure. Human beings are wired that way. It is one of the foods that marriage feeds on for survival. Low, scanty or absence of intercourse in marriage is a genocide against the marriage, it generates rancour in the family.
There is always an unpleasant reaction to every sexual denial that takes place in marriage. Every marriage carries life as human beings function with the life that present in him or her. Human beings need food to survive, so do marriage needs food to survive, and one of the foods for marriage is sexual intercourse.
It possesses the nutrients that marriage needs for optimum result.
Wrong idea about sex.
The idea that sex is only for men, and not for women to demand, is a wrong one. It defies God’s sexual purpose for human beings.
Both man and woman have urge for sex provided they have blood flowing in their body. They must react to sex, except for those that their urge is dead.
The level of an individual’s sexual demand is a function of his or her sex drive. If one’s libido is high, the demand will be high. The lower the libido, the lower the demand.
If someone with a lower libido marries someone with a higher libido, there will be a little challenge but can be resolved and enjoy one another.
This is one of the major problems of marriage today.
If you are in the same situation, please talk to a professional who can assist you.
When you make yourself available for your spouse sexually, you have just fed your marriage with one of the best foods it likes eating. You and your family will enjoy the marriage.
Conclusion.
Your marriage deserves to live. Feed your marriage with the foods prescribed above. It would make the marriage a better place for joy, happiness, peace, and harmony to dwell. Where there are ingredients like these, it’s hard for the devil to take over.
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