11 May Dating is not marriage
To the singles.✍️
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Dating right for the marriage….
Relationship date.
Dating is a friendship relationship between two opposite sex who move together. The purpose is to watch each other’s lifestyle, generally for compatibility for marriage.
Dating time is a studying time. Never hide yourself and your character while dating. This will enable the other person to identify it, comment, and correct you where necessary. This will help you to change the ones that need to be changed before proceeding to engagement and courtship, finallyto marriage.
Define your relationship while dating, and get out of it if it would not work.
Don’t keep yourself or force anyone waiting unnecessarily in such a relationship. Waste no one’s precious time. The place of the Holy Spirit is just too important in any relationship. Make him a friend.
Before taking any step, however, make sure you carry him along. If he does not approve of the step you want to take, no matter how good you think it is, exercise absolute patient. He knows better, and he does not fail in his duty.
God’s role, not your role.
Don’t play God’s role to believe that what is not in a human being will suddenly manifest in him or her overnight. What would you do if it prolongs beyond what your ability can carry? That’s why it always looks like God does not answer prayer.
What you could have avoided that you chose to put all your body into, blindly, in the name of love will always have implications.
Don’t push your responsibility to God.
He can’t give you water, and you will expect him to come and Bath you.
For example, a man who beats you often while dating, you don’t need anyone to tell you what he can do by the time you award all your life to him.
A lady who beats anyone she sees around you, including female siblings and cousins. If she beats your mum when you’re finally married to her, it won’t be strange. If you like to put your head into, please do this to save your generation.
Keep your pastor’s wife away from her so that she would not foolishly lay her hands on the anointed of God. There are men of God that when you are rude to them, they take it, but when you extend it to their wives, they don’t wait.
Value your time.
Never be deceived, dating is not marriage. Stop wasting your precious time on any date that does not look like becoming a marriage. There is no doubt, a date is a part of the procedure to the destination called marriage, but it’s not meant to take a chunk of your time.
The train of life is moving, it waits for nobody. The world is created in a way that if an individual takes it as a choice to place less value on his or her time like all belongs to him, the world has no choice than to follow suite and join him in wasting his or her time.
Dating time is meant for you to fasting your eyes on the wall in order to see clearly what the handwriting looks like. Is it for real or not, can this take you there or is the plan to keep you in that spot?
Who do you date.
This is a pure fact that no date comes with no reason. Every date that ever comes from an opposite gender is always for a purpose. It’s either negative or positive. It is you that will choose or decide the one you want. Many entered into dating ignorantly without asking what it stands for. They only get into the relationship to know that such a date is never going to be a plus but negative. In some cases, they can’t quit easily because of the things that are involved, like unwanted pregnancy or threat. On this note, we are making this clear for others not to become victims as many did in the past.
Who dates
Kind of daters are:
1. Commercial daters.
2. Professional daters.
all they do is to waste people’s time,
3. Gold digger,
4. Purposeful dater.
1. Commercial daters.
These are those who date for business reason. They go close to anyone they think that has what they want in business as a friend by offering him or her the needed care as at that time. This enables them to find their ways into the life of the one they target.
Their focus is the business in that person’s hand which they want to be part of. They can do everything to entice their targets into date, especially when they see that the target has a vacuum for a relationship partner.
What he or she sees is love, what the other side sees is different, it’s business. What are all these for? It’s all about business and money.
The funniest thing, some of them date more than two to three different men or ladies at a time purposely for business or contracts.
Commercial daters go as far as looking for a link who can connect them to what they want and promise them marriage by going on a date with them.
Advice for you.
You can’t be dating and be sleeping not to think as an intelligent person to know the aim of a man or woman who finds him or herself into your life, to fulfil his or her mission. Are you ready to cross a dating line into a marriage with a man or woman who will end up a relationship as soon as the business that joined you together ends?
Don’t date him or her the moment you discover that the intention is to get what you have or what you can help them to achieve. Coming to date you first will be the best way to quickly get what they want. What about your own emotions? Save yourself from undue headache.
2. Professional daters.
These set of people, their profession is dating, that is their means of livelihood. Dating is their work, responsible people must be careful not be victims of their style.
They spend so much money to kit and be attractive to the rich and wealthy ladies in the case of men.
In the case of women, they do the same. They target nice men who can give without looking back. Likewise, they don’t stop at dating one man at a time. Not only that, but they have them in numbers with funny tag names on their phones.
A lot have gone down been scapegoats in the hand of this kind of people.
Beware, dating is not marriage. Never service a date with the resources you cannot let go when the table turns. If you are vigilant, you will surely get to know the real person they are. They don’t like to hear “when are we going to get married”. By that you will know who they are.
Some in this category target the virgins. They joy in taking the virginity of the virgins. They are proud to be the first to attend to him or her sexually. Especially to the females. The moment they get what they want, they begin to misbehave to her, taking her for granted, even coming up with undue excuses that will make them to break up the relationship.
Some of them also date base on contract. They date a target to get expensive information for anyone who contracts them for the assignment. Their reward is with who employs them. Whatever love they share with the target finds no place in their heart, it’s just a script that ends at the last scene.
Do this
Before going into a date you expect will lead you to a marriage, look at it very well and ask yourself “is this man or woman ready to settle for marriage any moment from now “? Don’t just delay yourself in their hands. If you make mistakes and get pregnant for him or impregnated her, it may cost you the expenses you don’t bargain for, which is capable of running you down.
3. Gold digger.
A gold digger is a man or a woman who is after another person and goes into a relationship with him or her for a hiding and personal agenda. Usually, the purpose is to take what belongs to that person, such as inheritance, money, or wealth.
Gold digger does not think otherwise, it’s either he gets what he wants or quiet and blackmail the one who refuses to be a victim.
No wonder the Bible says in
John 10:10a
A thief comes to steal, kill, and destroy. GWT
Gold diggers enter into the lives of their targets, proves to be real and serious. They have an agenda, they don’t go beyond a dating line. They can remain at the point of dating but would be so real and loving like already in the marriage. I am happy to let you know that he or she is watching perfectly to get your moment called unguided hour to strike. Mostly they get the best of their victims and disappear.
They are naturally lazy to work or build from the foundation. They are parasites that leverage on the sweat of others to live.
Advice for you.
Gold diggers are always attracted to what they see, when you are going in for a date, never appear equivalent your worth.
b. Avoid unnecessary praises.
c. Ask your dater what he does, if he has nothing doing, ask him or her why? If he cannot produce a cogent answer, keep watching for some days!
Ask him or her later what he or she intends to do, if he starts to mention a project that requires humongous sponsorship, advise him or her to start small. If he refuses, that is a gold digger, run.
4. Purposeful dater.
These are the ones who date genuinely for the purpose of marriage. They mean business, they have no time to waste. The males are the ones that will start asking for the time to meet the parents of the parents of the lady, primarily to show his presence before the official family meeting.
This enables them to proceed to courtship and finally formalize the relationship to marriage. Real love resides in purposeful dating.
The attitude of the females are homey.
The females in this category are always ready to receive marriage proposal of the serious ones with all joy. Those in this category are not after your fish, but what can offer them the fish. They look at what you are capable of in the future.
This category can be likened to John 10:10b
I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly. GWT
There is life in anyone who has the spirit of God. He does not think of imitate gain, but what he or she can offer as value that will showcase him or her. If you are opportune to meet some guys or ladies, the first time you meet them, what they look at is how they can add value to your life.
Case study.
A young man has an appointment scheduled to come up to in a park to meet a representative of a company to discuss business. Unfortunately, he came a bit late. He arrived with apology tender for arriving late. His car was littered with splash mud all over. The tyres were so dirty. It occurs to the lady that he came through a rough way under construction. Of course, that was the only way he knew to the venue.
They both entered into the room meant for the meeting to take place. The lady just excused herself out. To do what? She went to engage the service of someone who can assist to wash the car of the company’s business representative, who came for the meeting at her cost.
After the meeting, the man came out was asking for his car, the one he could find close his car was so clean. It was the plate number that he used to identify the car as his. He was speechless to know that the lady who met with him was the one who transformed the car.
What a pleasant human being, a pleasant woman.
She directed the man through a better route back to the office.
Two months later, they reconvene a meet to conclude the deal. This time around they strictly demanded for the lady to be part of those who would come for the meeting, and if it would be only one person from them, it should be the lady. People were wondering what that could mean!
The man had sounded the trumpet of lady among his people to be a wonderful single woman earlier.
She arrived at the meeting venue with other two members with herself, with curiosity all over the faces of those who came with her.
That was the day she met her husband, who happens to be the son of a wealthy man, who came with his son in a business visit to a friend there. It was the commendation about her that the gentleman heard that moved him, and he said, I have found a wife. It was a pleasant proposal.
Pleasant advice.
If you are fortunate to meet such a man or a woman, don’t pretend as someone who does not have interest, waste no time. After your due diligence, on the ground of integrity and dignity, accept the proposal.
In a case that you are a man, present the proposal very fast, before someone next to you may apply a quick finger ahead of you. Good thing is not for only one person. Such a woman who can add value to the person you are currently are not many.
Conclusion
Dating is not a crime, you just need to date responsibly. Ensure you are into a compatible date. If you are ready for marriage, don’t stay waiting for someone who is not ready yet.
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