29 Nov Marriage Treasure (Series 3)
Love.
Love covers multitude of sins.
The power that love carries is so great that it has what it takes to make sin lose its place. If you have love, it would be difficult for you to forgive anyone who sins against in life. 1 Peter 4:8-9
Thank you for reading this post, don't forget to subscribe![8]And above all things have fervent charity among yourselves: for charity shall cover the multitude of sins.
[9]Use hospitality one to another without grudging.
Love is a strong feeling or affection that one has towards another to do the unusual.
It is sad and very unfortunate that a lot do not know what love looks like. They are missing love for something else. Some will be killing another, and yet, they will call it love. Sleeping with another man’s wife and someone will say I love her.
Someone said I loved the sister, yet he wants to sleep with her before they finally get married. Where is the place of love here? I can’t find it!
The real love is the love that does not base playing his part on what the other party does or has to do.
If you think you have love let us look at the book of 1corinthians 13: 4-7 together, there may be a reason for you to upgrade your love in your marriage, and if you do not have at all, this can help you to possess the love your marriage needs.
Attributes of love
1 Corinthians 13:4
a. Love is patient,
B love is kind.
c. It does not envy,
d. it does not boast,
e. it is not proud.
1 Corinthians 13:5
f. It does not dishonor others,
g. it is not self-seeking,
h. it is not easily angered,
i. it keeps no record of wrongs.
1 Corinthians 13:6
j. Love does not delight in evil, but
rejoices with the truth.
1 Corinthians 13:7
k. It always protects,
l. always trusts,
m. always hopes,
n. always perseveres.
Here we break it down for your clear understanding.
a. Love is patient.
Love, if it is genuine, it exercises patience on every matter in relationship and marriage. It does not jump to conclusions. It gives room for investigation on any issues. If offers a benefit of doubt.
In any marriage where there is a genuine Love, it is difficult for the devil to have his way to push the family into crisis.
They allow patience to play its role among them.
They are swift to hear but slow to conclude.
Sometimes, matters that would have broken such a family ends up as “dead-on-arrival” matter because the family has the culture of 1 Thessalonians 5:21
Prove all things; hold fast that which is good.
Lack of patient has caused many families their relationship. Countless men in this pattern have acted foolishly to have sent their wives packing on fake information, only to get the fact latter when the damage has been done.
▪︎ Love is patient for the unusual to happen
▪︎ Love is patient for the mountain to move
▪︎ Love is patient to get honey out of a rock.
▪︎ Love is patient for water to start to spring from a desert. Etc
Love patiently stand by a spouse in the time of trial; it could health wise, it could be in conception, it could be finance.
Love wait patiently in hope and prayer for the expected time to come.
Jacob stood by Hannah in her time of conception trial.
1 Samuel 1:6-8
6.And her adversary also provoked her sore, for to make her fret, because the LORD had shut up her womb.
7 And as he did so year by year, when she went up to the house of the LORD, so she provoked her; therefore she wept, and did not eat.
8 Then said Elkanah her husband to her, Hannah, why weepest thou? And why eatest thou not? And why is thy heart grieved? Am not I better to thee than ten sons?
b. Love is kind.
The kindness born out of love always produces the best; it’s always unconditional. Love do fell the pulse of others, sometimes share their pains. It’s an act of love for going the extra mile for the kingdom.
Any relationship that lacks kindness cannot stand a test of time. Any marriage that practices eye for eye, and hand for hand (vengeance generally) cannot produce peace and happiness.
Despite a misunderstanding between a couple, kindness in love will not allow one to get back at the other in vengeance. She will still go ahead to rub the back of the spouse.
Kindness in love is a drive that pushes to go the extra mile to cause others to smile.
Every marriage needs the service of kindness. Husband and wife need to be kind to one another if they want their marriage to please God.
c. It does not envy.
Envy is a desire to possess, own what someone has, and even be like him.
Nevertheless, envy could be positive or negative. If it carries the spirit of witchcraft, it is deadly, and it can never produce any good.
Love rejoices with celebrants. If you love your spouse, you will rejoice with him or her while been promoted. It doesn’t matter if she got a better job, pay, and post than you do, rejoicing with her is rejoicing with the family. If you have the mind of God, you will rejoice with him or her.
The success is not for one person. You know why?
The bible says in Genesis 2:24
Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.
If a couple still see each other as independent, everyone for himself, something is wrong, and it needs to be fixed.
You can join hands together and pray for the one who not yet there for family increase and expansion.
Yours must not be the occasion that husband would believe if the woman does better, she would ride him. And madam if you do better don’t ride him, please be humble.
d. It does not boast.
Love does not boast, no matter how rich or wealthy a man or woman of love is, he or she will never boast in what he or she has. Whatever he or she has acquired in life, are not allowed to push to start boasting.
There are people who boast of their little Achievement over their spouse and even send them with insult to their biological family.
It is not only peculiar to women, there are men who boast of how big of they are against their wives. She must not express her opinion, that may land her where she does not expect.
e. It is not proud.
In everything that love has, love gives thanks to God. Love knows that, every good and perfect gift comes from God, it is God that giveth power to get wealth. Pride does not have a place in God, Lucifer did it, he became the enemy of God.
Isaiah 14: 12-15
12 – How art thou fallen from heaven, O Lucifer, son of the morning! How art thou cut down to the ground, which didst weaken the nations! — null
13 – For thou hast said in thine heart, I will ascend into heaven, I will exalt my throne above the stars of God: I will sit also upon the mount of the congregation, in the sides of the north: — null
14- I will ascend above the heights of the clouds; I will be like the most High. — null
Isa.14.15 – Yet thou shalt be brought down to hell, to the sides of the pit. – KJV
Why do couples look down on one another? The husband looks at the wife as someone who has no choice, anything that comes, she must abide by, especially if she has nothing doing.
The wives in some cases are worse, almost taken over the place of her husband. The authority of some men have been submitted to the woman, this is not voluntarily done but because the woman is the financier in the family, she believes everything should end on her table.
That is accurately the reason some families will not allow their sons to marry any lady who earns more than their sons, it’s not always like that anyway.
There are ladies in our society who are very humble. They formed a strong home where no one knows what is happening in the family. They have things in common, and that is how God wants it to be,
Genesis 2:23-25
23 – And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man. — null
24 – Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. — null
25 – The two of them, the Man and his Wife, were naked, but they felt no shame.
The original God’s plan for marriage is for the husband and wife to be in one spirit and body. What others say about their unity is not relevant especially when it adds no value to their union.
Whatever a man or a woman becomes in his or her family is because of the family, everyone in the family must enjoy it together, and if it’s the other way round, they must join hands together to proffer solution to the mater, as it is said in verse 25 above. When one is naked, the other must see him or herself also naked.
f. It does not dishonor others,
Love is so respectful. It honours other’s opinion.
It respects age, office, status, opinions, contributions, value, and God’s position.
A wife is not a slave, neither she’s an hour help. She’s a mother, the wife of your youth. Irrespective of the difference between your age? She deserves to be respected.
Love respect office, if someone was a junior to you and he or she got a promotion above your level, you need to honour him or her base on that office. God knows why it is so.
Your church mate suddenly became your pastor’s wife, it is good for you to know that she’s no longer who she was. She’s now a different person entirely. You must respect her as the pastor’s wife she is. It is love that can make this happen. If you don’t have love, you wouldn’t like to honour her having known where she’s coming from.
If you love your husband, you will honour him. You may be older than the man in age, that has not placed you over or above him. You will not be the first or the last to be older than her husband.
Your Children’s opinion needs to be respected. They deserved to be listened to, they too can make a reasonable contribution that will help the family.
Love honours the elders and correct them where they make mistakes respectfully.
1 Timothy 5:1-2
[1]Rebuke not an elder, but intreat him as a father; and the younger men as brethren;
[2]The elder women as mothers; the younger as sisters, with all purity.
g. It is not self-seeking.
Do you know, there are families like that where the husband will say, if he is not great, his wife cannot be great, and that is a demonic mentality? Everything this type of husband does is to keep pulling the woman down. Whenever she’s trying to get up, whenever opportunity comes her way, men like this always oppose to it.
At this juncture, I pray for you, if you are still single, you shall not fall into such hands in Jesus name.
In the face of opportunities, love does not present himself unduly, it applies a round peg in a round hole, and a square peg in a square hole.
If you have love, and you have a family you sprang from, you will know that husband too came from a family. There are responsibilities expected of him in the family, which you must help him to fulfil. If all you do is how your own family alone can take the whole space, you don’t have love.
h. It is not easily angered.
The spirit of anger is a killer, a destroyer, and a waster. Anyone who’s still under the capture of the spirit of anger is a slave to the devil.
h.
There is no one with the spirit of anger that can be a good spouse because with the spirit of anger many have destroyed their homes. No one with the spirit of love is a slave to anger.
A slave to anger is the person that cannot control the way he gets angry, people like this exercise their anger even in the public, In the presence of kings and queens. No respect for time, place, and age.
Some are even proud of it, it’s their family logo, and they glory in the wicked attitude. There can never be peace in a marriage where the spirit of anger rules. You don’t need to be told, when you get to a family, and you see that anger is the fourth man in their own fire, that they don’t have love.
Love does not get angry easily, anger has destroyed so many marriages. If anyone wants to succeed in his marriage, he or she must first deal with the spirit of anger in his or her life.
Anyone who knows how to control his or her anger will know how to love. If any man says he has love, and his or her anger has not been dealt with, he’s a liar, he doesn’t know what love is.
John.14.15 –
If ye love me, keep my commandments.
Therefore, the bible says:
Eccl.7.9 – Be not hasty in thy spirit to be angry: for anger resteth in the bosom of fools.
A Simple case study.
A man got married to a lady he said he loved, whom he beats without any respect. When people discovered that this man beats his so called ‘the woman I love’ on many occasions, he does it mercilessly to the point that people started advising the woman to quit. The tragedy is, shortly after the beating, he would start begging her.
He said, his reason for always doing so is because he loved her. He does not want her to talk to anybody, especially the male counterpart.
With genuine reason or not, if she ever returns home late, she doesn’t need a prophet to tell her that trouble is lying waiting for her at home.
If care is not taken, the man will kill her one day. No
One is perfect, we stay together in tolerance, and we can only do this perfectly in love, not by beating and fighting. We can all see that this man has not dealt with the spirit of anger in his life.
You can now see that Love in man’s nature is different from the love in boy’s nature, this is the stage where boys are separated from men. Boys prefers violence, while men look for solutions. Anger has not made this man to become a man he should be, he’s still a boy.
Are you a man or a boy? Are you a mother or a baby girl?
i. It keeps no record of wrongs. (NIV)
No man, I repeat, no man is perfect in live, love calls for forgiveness and to correct the wrongs of one another.
j. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. (NIV)
Love does not rejoice in the misfortune of another person; rather, it delights in his success and join in celebrating the success and the achiever.
There are men who do not want their wives to become victims of misfortune (knowing fully well, that if anything happens to her, it may take out of his time), yet they don’t pray for her promotion (operation don’t fail, don’t pass). The love in such a relationship is weak, and it’s a Product of ignorance of the highest order. Vice versa.
If you have love, you will celebrate every success of your spouse. It is wickedness for you not celebrate or rejoice with your spouse for any achievement made in his or her endeavour.
There are occasions where a wife moved further to add to her academic credentials, which makes her more qualify than her husband. In the atmosphere of love, this success is for the family, and it’s a great honour to the husband. It calls for a family celebration.
k. It always protect. (NIV)
Love own the responsibility of protections to the spouse. Either husband or the wife has number one obligation to protect his or her spouse from external threats. Your spouse must have a belief, in the face of any challenge, that you will protect him or her.
This is while some people do wait for their spouses in some maters to come and fix the damage done by him or her because he or she knows that the spouse will not leave him or her in the trouble.
That alone is an immunity against heart attack, high blood pressure and the rest.
Kindly note, whatever you do to protect your spouse is done to also save you out of some needless troubles. Any good done for your spouse is as well for you.
l. Always trust. (NIV)
Love always trusts like a child, and love is also in the position to be trusted. With love, you must trust your spouse, and he or she must trust you. If you say you love, and you do not or cannot trust your spouse, something is wrong! If you love, your love must be with trust; either to be trusted or to trust your spouse. In your case, If your spouse cannot trust you, maybe you have a questionable character, and that is dangerous for anyone to claim love.
m. Always hopes. (NIV)
Love always hope for the best, even when situation says otherwise.
n. Always persevere. (NIV)
There is nothing good that ever comes easily, for good thing to come, it requires perseverance.
Before some major breakthrough will surface in marriage, the couple needs to persevere and keep praying to God for manifestations. Though, it’s not easy, but with ‘Love’ they will both wait upon God for answers and for the time to come.
I heard people saying they have love, yet their slogan is “For good; for stay – For bad; For go” that means, they are ready to remain with a man if things are still going on fine but to disappear when things go bad.
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